We Lost the Word Common in Common Courtesy
Posted: Friday, October 01, 2010
by Abe Blauvelt
Anymore it seems the phrase "common courtesy" is becoming a footnote in the annals of societal niceties. At least the "common" part is.
All you have to do to understand what I mean is to walk through a mall. People push, shove, bump and cut you off without even acknowledging you exist more or less apologizing for the intrusion. They are so concerned with their own little sphere that surrounds them that they either do not see what they do as being discourteous or they just don't care.
How did society become so inconsiderate?
Should we blame the "me" generation of the sixties and the hippie mantra of not trusting anyone over 30? Or maybe it began in the seventies when technology started making our lives and therefore our attitudes a little freer. It's possible we could blame the greed generation of the eighties where those who were smart knew how to get one over on the unsuspecting public. Then again the nineties weren't much better with the attitude of do what we want, just don't get caught.
Any way you slice it and no matter how you want to lay blame, the fact is the days of Miss Manners are obviously long gone. She must have been overtaken by Miss No-Manners instead. If anyone knows where I can find a copy of that particular book please let me know. I need to start re-programming myself so I can be more in tune with the world around me.
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More commentsYou’re right in today’s world I really take notice to someone that says thank you and please, because you seldom hear it anymore. We live in the Me Generation; so many people are only concerned about themselves! Today we see people taking phone calls or texting leaving the person they are supposed to be visiting with waiting, what happened to manners?I don't know what happened to manners guy. I wish I knew.
Sometimes I think considerate friendly people generally congregate in certain cities or areas, and if you find yourself in one it's horrible. Sorry you have such negative experiences, Abe.Yeah it's not too great where I am at. I think it's the area I live in and not in general by the responses.
Hi Abe.When Bernd and I first moved to the Prescott area of Arizona, things were different than in SoCal. People were polite. They greeted you when you passed with a friendly "hello" or "how're ya doin'," whether they knew you or not. That was in 1993. Now it is a less friendly town and people are indeed more concerned with where they are going, how fast they can get there and what they want. Sad isn't it?Sorry, but I don't want a copy of "Miss No-Manners." I'm seriously hoping for the return of common courtesy and I lead by example. Color me righteous! :)Thanks for saying it like it is.Hugs, Dianne
Abe, you are so absolutely right. And the cure is for people to be full and effervescent themselves. To be so polite, so unignorably (is that a word?) polite, that the world can't ignore you, and they must be polite tin return or look like an idiot. Thanks for your good writing.
Great article Abe! We really need to teach manners to the new generation, or miss no-manners will completely take over.
Very well written. I do agree with you.
I agree with the sentiments of the article, but there are a couple of sentences that should be rewritten to make the sense clearer, starting with the first one of the article.
Sad, but very true unfortunately.
Very nicely done. Both 'common' and 'courtesy' are gone from the language, to be replaced by 'mine', 'me first', etc. It might have started with the eighties as you say, yet it really is getting out of hand. Of course, watch televison (especially politics) and there it is for all of us to emulate. Our politicians do it, so why not us? Good job, sir.
Well I think little by little, the advent of new technologies definitely plays a part. Instead of walking from A to B saying hi to people, they have their Apple earbuds in, paying attention to their shuffle or i-pod. The other day I saw a woman j-walking and a bicycle cop stopped her when she got to the other side and asked her why she crossed illegally? She at first acted as though she didn't hear the officer, and took out her earbuds with a mystified look on her face, as if the music kept her from seeing the "don't walk" sign flashing. You see my point... people are sinking into their own little bubble, and face to face interactions are coming to be old-fashioned, unless you happen to be a politician, car salesman, or the like. We need to stop giving our kids cell phones at age 10 (or whatever early age). We need to attempt to have a conversation with the children while in the minivan, instead of turning on the dvd player to promote a "quiet car ride." I could go on. Abe, god help us. Thanks for the article! :-)
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